Snow Business

This is the Christmas Snowman that has been passed down in Karen's family for three generations so far. It is still the original snowman (in somewhat the same sense that Trigger's broom in Only Fools and Horses was still the same one he had for 20 years).




Last year, I understand Hazel performed a cotton-wool graft.

This year, I have just completed a base transplant and also HRS (hat reconstruction surgery) whereby the hat was stripped to its components and re-assembled using original crepe bindings that were salvaged during the base-change operation.

With luck and TLC, the Gough Snowman may survive a few more decades !

Out on the tiles

Lately, there has been little excuse not to tackle some loose ends of a DIY nature around the house. One such niggle has been the floor tiles in the kitchen/utility. The sound made each time a cat stepped on a loose corner was a regular reminder that some were no longer secure.

Using a toilet plunger as a makeshift tester, I discovered that a total of 20 tiles (in sections of 2, 4 and 14) were in need of attention.

Perhaps I should have opted for the "quick-fix" - a few dabs of some wonder glue. However, the existing tile cement was very brittle, so it seemed only right to remove it all and re-do it properly. How hard could it be ?

As usual, I had underestimated the great complexity of all-things-DIY. So many different tile adhesives, with only the merest clues at what the real and important differences might be. The wrong kind of notches on trowels. The difficulty of measuring a "thick and creamy consistency" for the cement mixture.

However, the re-fixing of the smaller sections seemed to go smoothly. I was going along well with the 14-tile section when, with 2 left, I found I was 2mm out at the end of the row. These porcelain tiles are rock-hard so 2mm might as well have been 2 feet. No way were the last two going in, and the rest of the tiles were too firmly fixed to budge.

It was a major conundrum !

In the end, the least-worst option seemed to be to take up all 12 tiles and start again. At this point, I was hoping for the quantum theory of glue to work in my favour. That's where you want glue to be unbreakable when you want the thing to hold together, but for it to be easily unstuck when you want to pull it apart !

No such luck, although it could have been worse. Just about 6 hours to chip away all the new-old cement and do the whole thing from scratch !

The finished tiles can now be viewed on location in Bedford.

Thumbs Up

Matt has been adding bulges as the training regime for rowing makes an impact. However, he has recently been suffering from a bump in the wrong place. The cause of his infected thumb has been variously attributed to biting his nails and/or the duck-poo laden waters of Bedford's river.

In any case, we hope the antibiotics prescribed today will see amputation being averted.

3 and 2, and 1

Yesterday was the third "Brickhill golf" game. The first was back on FA Cup Final day when 6 of the "Brickhill dads" turned out to play 18 holes at Mowsbury organized by Derek.

Actually - Derek, Andy & I played 18 whilst Len, Alan and Boz skived off after 9 on that occasion.

In the game that went all the way, Derek beat me by about 3 shots or 2 holes despite a rearguard effort by myself.

On the second occasion, which I arranged, everyone but Derek and I dropped out before tee-off ! Derek had been taking lessons and they obviously worked, as he crushed me.

This time, I intended to do better but my poor matchplay skills were to the fore. Derek played a solid opening three holes - easily going two up before I halved in 5 at the 3rd. He then played a poor 4th hole and I (just) managed to win one back. I parred the 5th to square the match.

Now Derek handed me a golden opportunity - he scored 8-7-10 on holes 6 through 8 and I managed to win only one of those !

When Derek parred the 9th, he took a 1 hole lead into the back 9 where it was actually very close in a matchplay situation but a poor 13th hole from me saw me fall 2 behind with 5 to play.

Derek finally wrapped the mach up with a 5 on the 16th for victory 3&2.

It was now fairly dark (we had teed off at 3:15 at the twilight rate). Derek had left his glasses at home so was playing in prescription sunglasses, so he had only the dimmest view of what now happened at the dead-rubber 17th.

It's a downhill 162 Yard par3 and Derek opted for an optimistic 9-iron which went slightly left and well short.

I looked at the card and the flag and the dramatic drop to the green and my first thought as usual is "no way is that 160 yards, looks like a sandwedge to me" but I know from experience that usually the numbers don't lie and that my efforts to get there with the lofted club often result in a half-way landing.

With a big green and no particular danger behind, I opted for a 7-iron. I assume I can hit a 7-iron 145 yards which seemed in theory the right distance with the flag at the front.

It would not be unfair to say my tee-hitting was poor on the day. Perhaps the pressure was off, or the knowledge that I had plenty of club allowed me to swing more comfortably. In any case, it was a beautiful strike - it sounded great, it was dead straight, and it soared up beautifully in the way it's supposed to. It looked like it would go for miles.

"Back of the green" declared Derek (whose ball-spotting skills are not the greatest !)

I followed the ball as it descended almost vertically and seemed to make landfall just at the very front edge and in the gloom rolled out of sight but apparently in great shape. Clear birdie shout.

"Hole in one" I countered.

We made our way down and as we passed Derek's ball 20yards short of the front-edge, there was still no sign of my ball on the green.

Now, how many times have you thought "I can't see it, it must be in the hole".

I asked Derek to accompany me to the flag. Even now I couldn't tell you whether I really thought it was in but - yes - unbelievably there it was.

Hole 17, Mowsbury Golf Course at 18:45 on 28th September 2008. Won in One.

I held up the ball for the imaginary crowds to cheer.

After that, it didn't seem worth playing the 18th. Doubtful whether it's ever worth playing again !

Facing Up

I have 100 friends on facebook as of today ! Since this is plainly considerably more than my number of real friends, what is going on ?

Well, unlike some people on facebook, I can say that I know all 100 of these people (and they know me) but I don't send them all Christmas cards !

I started out with one friend when someone invited me to be their friend. I then invited a handful of people. Then the whole facebook effect kicked in when friends of friends who knew me invited me to be their friends too. I had a much lower "hurdle" for accepting a friend request than initiating one.

Eventually, as the numbers grew, I too started inviting people as friends who were more like acquaintances with common interests.

So it goes on, and here we are. There are 100 Million facebook users, so I guess there is still some room for my list to grow !

Statistically Speaking

So, the anecdotal eveidence that we are the only people in Britain who bought a new car has been confirmed by official reports of the latest car sales figures.

The news announced these as catastophic. I read more about it with interest in The Times today.

However, I discovered that (as all too often today) the stats are presented in a misleading and ultimately uninformative way.

I read that the sales of several marques are down 50 - 70% - they're listed out. But, those turn out to be the changes from July to August. With September (and new reg) just around the corner, obviously August will lag July.

Are these drop-offs much worse than usual ? Undoubtedly, but we have no idea by how much.

What we need are Year-on-Year figures, clearly, but these are not given anywhere.

We are told that the August figures compare in a shockingly bad way with August (so same month) figures from way back into the 1960s. That is certainly striking, but of course in the past, August was a bumper month as new registrations began on 1st August - it was the peak month. Now, presumably, it is routinely the lowest month as it is the month PRIOR to the new registration AND in the summer lull.

So, the comparison would have to be taken with great circumspection.

It's a shame that the real story - which most likely is bleak enough in plain fact - is so obscured by a clearly faulty presentation.

What I find even more frustrating is when journalists use completely false statistical or logical inference because they don't comprehend what is going on (whereas in this case, I am sure it was done for sensationalism which is at least understandable even if not necessarily desirable).

I think this may have overtaken my previous top irritation - reporting of news and especially of announcements before it has actually happened.

Going to Lapland

My desktop PC recently went into a sudden, deep and seemingly irrecoverable downwards spiral. With 4 PCS, 3 laptops, 2 internet-enabled XBOXs, 2 network printers as well as the occasional PSP etc. on our home network, I am used to trying to bring things back to life.

Generally the process involves a good deal of trial and error and, despite the incredible change in power and sophistication of the machinery, a lot of the techniques I use date back to the pre-microsoft days or even earlier.

Almost always a machine can eventually be recovered or repaired but in this case, the thing seems to be in quite a state. It won't even run properly in windows safe mode. It appears to be software-linked though, not a true hardware fault. My suspicions centre on Norton Internet Security as having triggered the decline.

I have chosen to give up and decided instead to install my laptop as the main computing centre. This has one big advantage of course in that there is no copying from one to the other.

So, after a few hours of feng shui, I have my laptop on my desk in place of one of the screens and it's wired up in all directions. Just add mouse, keyboard, screen,printer, power lead and speakers !

It seems to be working well.

I have also discovered the joys of internet radio. I am listening to Radio 4 streamed live on the iPlayer - very convenient.